No matter who or where you are in life, negative comments can always ruin your day. From celebrities to everyday people, ugly words suck and if not handled appropriately, they will attach themselves to you meaning you’ll begin to believe the lies. Most times when we hear negativity about ourselves or the people close to us, we lash out or shut down and both are poor ways to process our hurt. After my recent run in with a negative comment, I took time to be intentional about focusing my mind and getting over the offense I felt. I realized when I applied the three steps that I’m about to share with you, I had no desire to dwell on the negative any more. I let it go. My hope is that you will find solace in knowing that you are not alone in your struggles of letting negative comments roll off your back like water and there is a simple way to bounce back from the careless words said by another.
The first step to overcoming negative comments is to acknowledge them to yourself. If you thought that ignoring those rude words were going to solve your pain…
Be honest, you saw or heard the comment, it’s in your head and that’s okay. Acknowledging the issue gives you the opportunity to be real with yourself. Don’t act like your invincible to being hurt – even Superman had kryptonite. This part sucks because you do have to face the hurtful words and you may throw yourself a mini pity party but what doesn’t kill you will make you stronger.
Take some time to reflect on your self-worth. Are you what the negative commenter said? Heck NO you aren’t! Here’s a word of advice that my mother always told me “just because someone calls you a name or says you’re something, doesn’t make you that”. People will always have some type of rude or unnecessary opinion about you, what you do, how you live, what you look like, etc. Just because they don’t like it does not mean that their opinion is the standard. Take time to remind yourself of how awesomely amazing you REALLY are! Remind yourself that you got this far in life being apologetically unique and that’s what sets you apart. You may not be everyone’s cup of tea but you are surly someone’s chocolate milkshake!
Okay, so now that you have acknowledged the problem and you’ve reflected on how super awesome you are, now is the time to press forward. Life doesn’t stop because someone pissed you off. Focus on meeting and exceeding your goals! Pressing doesn’t mean that you ignore the hurt that you may still be feeling but it means that you’ve made the decision that you are not going to allow those feelings to dictate your mood, your interactions with others, or your success.
At the end of the day, you are who YOU say and believe you are and no one can tell you different. Don’t allow another person’s negative words to have power over you. People will ALWAYS have something negative to say but I challenge you to be the light in those situations. It’s so easy to retaliate to negativity with more negativity but you will feel better if you make the conscious decision to fight back with love, peace, patience, kindness, gentleness, and long suffering. I promise that you’ll feel much better when you do.
Njeri is a lifestyle blogger with a focus in all things beauty and fashion. Her expertise also includes event corresponding, brand consulting, and encouraging people to find happiness by living their truths.